First off my friend, DO NOT APOLOGIZE for being frustrated. You owe no one an apology and trust me, many people here feel like you do, or at least did at one time.
Sorry you've had to experience any of that, but you are not alone. I know that doesn't make you feel any better. 
The fire occured in 1973. That date is drilled into my head, believe me!
Secondly, I think you need to leave that part behind and take the next step. You will only get more flustered if you dwell on this. So let's see if I can help you. You need to do the following...
First off contact someone from the 45th Infantry Division, preferably someone from his regiment, the 180th. Here is a good start:
180th Reg - 45th Inf Div
Mr. Patrick Sbarra
220 Brainard Ave
Cape May Point NK 08212
609-884-6652
45th Inf Div - WWII - Korea
Mr. Raul Trevino
2145 NE Street
Oklahoma City OK 73111
210-681-9134
You need to get a hold of rosters, etc. and focus your research there. I'm sure they will be able to help you, or point you to others that you can talk to.
Next, you may want to contact the National Archives in St Louis and Maryland. Please note that you can go there yourself, have them copy some records for you, contact a research student or hire a private researcher to retrieve records for you. I am not going to go in depth right here, because I've gone over this in many previous posts. I also have info regarding this in the RESEARCH SECTION on this forum. I urge you to take a look there and then feel free to get back to me with further questions.
I have recently hired a private researcher and she is currently gathering records for me this week. 
I hope I have helped you. Now take a deep breath... 
Proud Daughter of Walter (Monday) Poniedzialek
540th Engineer Combat Regiment, 2833rd Bn, H&S Co, 4th Platoon
There's "No Bridge Too Far"