BEST JOKES-2
#1

was in the express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely

>>ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out

>>line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the

>>cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked

>>sweetly, "So which six items would you like to buy?" Wouldn't it be great

>>if that happened more often?!!!

>>

>>===========

>>

>>Because they had no reserv ations at a busy restaurant, my elderly neighbor

>>and his wife were told there would be a 45-minute wait for a table. "Young

>>man, we're both 90 years old," the husband said. "We may not have 45

>>minutes." They were seated immediately.

>>

>>================

>>

>>The reason congressmen try so hard to get re-elected is that they would

>>hate to have to make a living under the laws they've passed.

>>

>>====================

>>

>>All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the

>>aisle. They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the bride kissed her

>>father and placed something in his hand. The guests in the front pews

>>responded with ripples of laughter. Even the priest smiled broadly. As her

>>father gave her away in marriage, the bride gave him back his credit card.

>>

>>=======================

>>

>>Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and

>>get used to the idea.

>>

>>=======================

>>

>>Three friends from the local congregation were asked "When you're in your

>>casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what

>>would you like them to say? "

>>Artie said: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a Fine

>>spiritual leader, and a great family man."

>>Eugene commented: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and

>>servant of God who made a huge difference in people's lives."

>>Don said: "I'd like them to say, "Look, he's moving!"

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